Her ‘lord’, Her ‘master’, Her ‘redeemer’: (Removing the Reproach: Singleness & Celibacy Series PART II)
Singleness & Celibacy: Removing the Reproach Series Part II
"Until sisters realize righteous men are our redeemers - we won’t have a need to cry out for one. Sure we may even see men as needed to pay bills, do “man stuff,” take care of things - but honestly having a righteous husband is far deeper than just being able to get your car fixed when you need it.
Until we sisters see men are indeed designed to be our earthly saviors, with a charge to rule us as righteous patriarchs - we will continue to believe we nor our children need them.
Essentially the woman has made herself her own god and doesn’t understand the biblical design of patriarchy, rulership, and family; so she truly doesn’t see a man as the REDEEMER for her that she truly needs!"
Hence, I found this title very accurate as it pertains to the state of sisters.
If you're following from last week, you know we studied the creation and purpose of woman - and the charge that man was given over her. The blog "HER CREATION, HER PURPOSE” can be found here. I would certainly advise reading that blog before this one.
For those that are up to date, I want to look at a few things briefly.
The Biblical culture of marriage:
Biblically, a woman went from her father’s house to her husband’s house. She was not left “uncovered” in this. I had a sister to ask me where did I find this scripturally - the concept of the husband being a redeemer. As I pointed out to her, I will here in this blog as well. First, as stated - it was understood that women were to present themselves as virgins to their husbands, enter covenant and be with that man for the remainder of her life.
However, if the husband died without her having born him a son, we see something called a “Kinsman redeemer law.” What this does is place the responsibility of a next of kin to cover the woman in marriage and raise up a seed in the name of the deceased. (Leviticus 25) What really is this “redemption?” Who is it for? What does it establish?
Well yes, it establishes the bloodline of that patriarch but let’s recall back in Genesis where the result of Eve’s rebellion was that “your desire will be for your husband, and he shall rule over you.” Let’s go even further and look at where we are told that we (women) shall be saved through childbirth. What is a redeemer again? A redeemer - just as Pastor was speaking about - is one who comes to cleanse, wash, purify, restore: make whole again, restore value back to its original design, etc. We know that Christ redeemed all humanity back to Yahweh; however how is woman redeemed in the order of matrimony or her purpose on the Earth?
See, essentially when Eve sinned, she placed herself out of position with her husband and therefore the Most High. How can I say this? Does not the Word not say that the head of the woman is the man, and the head of every man is Christ? As we saw in the last blog, was it not Eve who stepped out of order - attempting to be as Yahweh? Therefore it would stand to be understood that in order for her to be redeemed - she would have to go BACK to the place she was designed to be; submitted to her husband. This is the redemptive power of the covenant of marriage and childbirth to woman.
Let us also consider the scriptures (Numbers 30) give a plain and detailed example of how man has authority over woman. In this chapter we see that a woman’s words can be nullified/voided by two individuals - her father or her husband. This is simply another example of the structure of redemption for woman through man. However, if we believe that it is okay for us to be single and celibate for any reason, how can we be righteously covered or redeemed? Moreover, how can we fulfill the purpose in which we were created for? It doesn’t line up with the Word.
Many women have chosen to stand on the writings of Paul, suggesting all be as him. However this is a very misguided stance; as Paul gives direct order to Timothy in what single women should do if they’re under 60 - and that is to get married. He also in Titus instructs the older women to teach the younger women on how to take care of their homes, love their children, and their husbands - that they may not bring shame on the Word of Yahweh. How and why would Paul give conflicting advice - being a man of Torah? I believe what Paul was saying was to be taken as simple as it was - he wished that all were as he, sold out to the ministry. Let’s be real, women are not called as men are first of all in the leadership positions. But if for any reason a woman is choosing to serve - then she must truly have the CALL! For this reason he says single woman can care to the ministry, but married women cannot.
See the thing that gets me with single women who say “God” wants them single is this: Most are absolutely NOT sold out to the ministry as Paul is describing. They have not given their lives to minister to apostles, bishops, pastors, etc. They have not given their lives to the church and are 100% taking care of the churches. Matter of fact - the women that do that, should be ELDERLY women; this is BIBLICAL. The YOUNGER women are to marry!
As Paul describes his peace in where Yahweh has called HIM, He also clarifies again that his singleness and celibacy is indeed a GIFT and not given to everyone. Now, as Paul addresses the Corinthian church - he is addressing sexual immorality in the church and the time in which they are in; troubling times and persecution. Yet - Paul says specifically that it is better to marry than to burn! Again, let’s be real. With 70% of colored women single mothers - we definitely are burning between those legs! He is saying it’s better for YOU to be married and having sex than steady fall into sexual immorality and BURN IN HELL; which also lets us know sexual immorality CAN send you to hell when I looked at the Greek word used in this passage (1 Corinthians 7:9).
Paul also continues in this context to say that there is a difference between a wife and a virgin! Let’s stop there because majority of single women are not virgins, nor are they practicing 100% purity on a daily basis, year after year. Even the ones “celibate” entertain relationships and dating, and all types of things that do not include what Paul says next; he says specifically “The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit: but she that is married cares for the things of the world, how she may please her husband.” Sis! How are you HOLY if you are not walking in sexual purity and purity in your spirit - but you’re celibate???
So, again, if we go back to last week’s understanding of woman’s creation and purpose and tie in this as well - it is detrimental to understand that first of all - again, the Lord has called us to be redeemed by our husbands. We can also find this in Ephesians, where the husbands are charged with loving his wife as himself and cleansing her. How are you receiving this cleansing or do you think that we are so special to Abba that He would completely overlook HIS purpose and design for you? Secondly, celibacy is indeed a gift. I know women that say that they are celibate are not walking in the gift of it because one minute they are single and the next minute they’re having gender reveals and announcing pregnancies; or even if they don’t get pregnant they are creating situationships or repeating cycles of dating, yearning for husbands. Their lifestyles aren’t set apart and they look just like the world. How has Yahweh given you a gift of singleness yet you desire marriage sis? It is not so.
Now, aside what Yahweh has called you to in the aspect of redemption - He has additionally called you to PURITY, sexual purity. We as women are to be virgins upon marriage and yes I know that that’s a small number. However, in your waiting on a redeemer - you SHOULD indeed be focused on sexual purity and holding yourself accountable to being purged and made cleaned for your redeemer! Esther was preparing months to even come into he presence of the KING! Ruth approached her redeemer in the form of a proposal! Yes, a proposal! She proposed to him. She knew she had not born a son and she knew according to the customs she covenanted with that she was owed that!
We have allowed this culture to “trick us out of our spot” as my lord husband would say. We have this notion that we can be without men because we can make our own money and even have children/attempt to raise children without our men. You may can pay a bill - but you CANNOT cover yourself in the spiritual realm as your husband would! You can make yourself orgasm alone (or with assistive devices) but you can’t REDEEM yourself in the eyes of the Most High! You cannot remove the reproach of a lack of covenant over your life, that comes with marriage and childbearing. Isn’t it amazing that the very thing that Yahweh told us would save us is exactly what this culture is telling us not to do!?
I had a woman I know who boldly told me she had been celibate 23 years. Twenty three years of believing that she is just fine as she is and Yahweh is pleased, although nothing in HIS Word confirms or commands that; but tells us to do just the opposite! We are commanded - COMMANDED - to be fruitful and multiply. See how singleness is another one of Satan’s, “Hath God said?” I will have to boldly say that 98% of women who are single and “celibate” are operating in an antiChrist, Jezebel spirit. THIS is why most will get offended with this first, defending their “revelation” that Abba must be okay with them being single.
Listen, it doesn’t take Yahweh 23 years to give you a husband but it may take you that long to surrender to Him in the aspect of letting HIM mold you into the wife HE wants you to be! See the difference there?
Which leads back to the very Word I believe I heard,
“My daughters have used singleness and celibacy as an excuse to avoid the accountability and healing that is needed to become wives.”
It’s much easier and sounds Holy to say, “Oh I’m just waiting on the Lord”, “Oh the Lord still preparing my Boaz”, “Oh in the Lord’s timing”, and etc. etc. etc.; excuse, excuse, excuse.
Have you REALLY SOUGHT THE LORD on why you’re still single?! Have you REALLY asked Abba to prepare you for your husband?!
Even worse!!! Now this pissed me off …
I also saw an actual “preacher” teaching this doctrine and a young lady shared it saying that Abba is okay with singleness because there aren’t enough men to physically go around. Well, in that she is right - however that is why forced monogamy is not Biblical! Polygyny, which is a lawful form of marriage in scripture, is the perfect solution for every woman to have a husband. But then THIS pisses women off too! Again, a direct example of our rebellion to the WORD! Women who humble themselves will realize this! This is seen in Isaiah 4:1 which says that in that day (sounds like this day) SEVEN women shall take hold to ONE man, saying “Hey we can afford ourselves - we can buy our own food and clothing but simply let us BE CALLED BY YOUR NAME TO TAKE AWAY OUR REPROACH.”
WELL, what reproach are they talking about? SINGLENESS. BARENESS. Yeah. That.
Next week, I’ll share my testimony of how Yahweh transitioned my heart into the heart of a wife, allowing me to be redeemed by my lord husband!
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“My Man is HER Man Too?!”/“My Man IS Her Man Too!!” is available!!
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